Son of a Dragon
by yetzer ha'ra
Summary: Scorpius has to deal with, among other things, a portrait portfolio, a New Age ghost, the Malfoy Internal Spy System, cruel instigator/dumb blond stereotypes, crippling food allergies, and the Murderer’s Map not to be confused with the Marauder’s map.
1. Giant PuffskeinsRejected Licorice

Son of a Dragon

Chapter 1: Giant Puffskeins and Rejected Licorice

Summary: Scorpius has to deal with, among other things, a portrait portfolio, a New Age ghost, the Malfoy Internal Spy System, cruel instigator/dumb blond stereotypes, crippling food allergies, and the Murderer's Map (not to be confused with the Marauder's Map.)

Malfoy nodded curtly at Potter, and turned to Scorpius. "Goodbye," he said curtly. He stared at the train, and his eyes misted over ever so slightly.

"If you ever need me, I will be in the third pocket of your leather satchel." He turned pointedly, seeing Scorpius looking altogether more frightened than what was befitting for a Malfoy.

"Make me proud, son. You are a Malfoy; you have nothing to fear." His deep voice, intended to comfort Scorpius, instead appeared to make him quail. "Your going-away gift will be in your dorm." Draco said, softer.

Scorpius walked forward, stiffly, bearing the weight of an enormous trunk made out of stained mahogany. A silver dragon adorned the lock, with fiery ruby eyes. He sighed, and handed the trunk to a porter, who smiled at him with a politeness that seemed compulsory. Scorpius walked onto the train, feeling completely naked as eyes set on him. His pale hair seemed to accentuate the idea that he was under a spotlight.

He finally chose an empty compartment and sat down on the plush velvet seats, noticing how he held himself like a deer poised for flight; his tendons were bunched up like tight shipman's knots, and he wondered idly if he could untangle himself. As though to prove his theory, the door to the compartment slammed open, and he stiffened, his legs prepared to spring up. A striking Asian boy with dark eyes, and black hair that in the incandescent lighting almost looked to have a blue tinge, like the shell of a beetle walked in.

"Oh, I'm sorry, this is the compartment where the prefects will be meeting. You can stay here if you want…" He trailed off. Scorpius seemed to try to make himself smaller, bunching up at the corners, and he shook his head quickly, and he fluttered out of the room.

His face paled with embarrassment, a trait he supposedly picked up from his father. He could hardly imagine his father embarrassed, though, and he heaved a quick sigh. Scorpius picked a compartment at random, only to find it occupied by an African-American boy with a rainbow scarf tied around his neck.

"Umm, hello. I'm Scorpius," he said hesitantly, shyly.

"I'm Seamus Thomas, and don't you laugh at that, Malfoy," he spat out venomously.

"That's not funny," Scorpius said, "my middle name is Hyperion." He hoped for a laugh or a chuckle, a tentative step towards starting a friendship. He received a glare that would wither daisies in return.

"Boo hoo." Thomas said, acid burning on his tongue.

"What's wrong?" Scorpius asked, closing his eyes briefly, knowing the answer.

"You're a Malfoy. Your grandfather killed the man who I'm named after." If looks could kill, Scorpius would be feeling his life slip away from him speedily. As it was, looks didn't kill, but Scorpius still felt his life slipping away from him slowly. His father had warned him about this. The Malfoys were viewed by both former Death Eaters and Aurors as traitors.

"I'm sorry…" Scorpius said. He turned to shuffle out.

"Get out of here. Look for sympathy from someone else, like the Potters." Thomas laughed bitterly. "Wait till James gets a hold of you. You'll be dead before anyone can say 'pale bastards.'"

Scorpius ran outside, and collapsed outside of the compartment. He was a Malfoy! He shouldn't have to spend his first ride ever into Hogwarts in the bathroom!

He sighed, and closing his eyes, opened the door to a random compartment.

What greeted him was the sight of an enormous Puffskein big enough to be a beanbag chair staring at him with large, yellow eyes. Its fur shone a tawny gold color which offset its striking eyes. A boy leaned up against the back side of the Puffskein, cradling a black and white kitten in his arms. Meanwhile, another boy who looked exactly like the first, from the milky-white hair to the twinkling blue eyes, had next to him a rat the size of a cat. Scorpius gulped fearfully, and slammed the compartment, running out.

However, next to him, he found a squeaking gray rat, and he realized he would probably have to return it. He turned back, and opened the door. He picked up the squirming rat by the tail, and dropped it back in side. He prepared to close the door when the twin with the giant rat snapped,

"Hey you! Where do you think you're going? Get in here!"

Scorpius came in again, flinching like a wounded dog.

"Why did you pick the rat up by the tail? You could have broken his spine!"

"I didn't know that, sorry," Scorpius said timidly.

"It's okay," the one leaning on the Puffskein. "He didn't know, Lorcan."

"Well, yeah, but…" Lorcan frowned.

"Anyways, I'm Lysander," the other one said calmly. "That's Lorcan over there. Who are you?"

"Scorpius Malfoy," he answered with a sinking feeling. Lorcan snorted.

"You know your dad used to make fun of my mom all the time?"

Scorpius paused. "My dad apparently did that to a lot of people… Who was your mom?"

"Luna Lovegood." Lysander said.

"That's so cool!" Scorpius said. "She discovered the Magorian, right?"

"That's our mom!" Lorcan said with a sarcastic enthusiasm. "So let me guess, you're getting beat up by a bunch of pissy people who don't get that you can't help what your dad did?"

"Just about," Scorpius admitted, feeling extremely relieved.

"Well what makes you think I'd be any different, you stinking Malfoy?" Lorcan snapped, his eyes growing cold and hard. Scorpius visibly sank in sadness.

Lorcan eyed him with a cold appraisal, then broke into a smile.

"Fooled you, firstie." He grinned. "I was being sarcastic."

"He does that a lot," Lysander said gently. "Anyways, you're welcome to stay in here. Anyone who tries to mess with you will have to go through Mungo first." He patted the gargantuan Puffskein, which chuckled darkly in a deep voice.

Scorpius sighed in relief. "Yeah, the only people I really have to avoid so far are Seamus Thomas and Maxima Goyle."

"Goyle's kid?" Lorcan laughed, petting the giant rat at his side. "I can see why. As the Muggles would say, she's 'built like a Mack truck.'"

Scorpius quirked a pale eyebrow, and then decided to give Lorcan the benefit of the doubt, and laugh.

"Are you allowed to bring the Puffskein, by the way?" Scorpius asked, gesturing to Mungo, who turned to him and glared.

"Yes and no… He can change size. My dad rescued him from Chernobyl. Most magical creatures left a while ago, except for Mungo, and he got a lot of the radiation. It had a very strange effect, as you can see." Lysander explained calmly. "Mungo will keep small when we get to Hogwarts… Right?" Mungo just grinned somewhat evilly.

"Yeah, it was a pity, I had to leave all my rats at home." Lorcan said. "I could only bring Günter and Prewitt." He pointed at the giant rat first then the small gray rat that had run away.

"And we had to leave behind the family pets as well," Lysander said, somewhat dejectedly.

"Yeah, our life might seem completely unrealistic to you, but it's All True," Lorcan said with mock solemnity. "Anyways, we're second years, so I guess we could _consider _showing you all the ropes."

Lysander laughed, gently laying a hand on his twin's shoulder. "Come on, Lorcan, be nice."

"Meh. This is me at my kindest. I only get more horrible and meaner. Within three weeks I will be craving human flesh and going out of my way to kick handicapped Muggle children." He stuck a tongue out at Lysander, and wore a very strange face halfway between laughter and a growl.

"Don't mind Lorcan," Lysander said, obviously used to this. "He's often sarcastic and rude. He's really very nice, though, or at least I _think_." The last he said in a fake stage whisper.

Scorpius chuckled.

"Oh yeah, we have to introduce you to our other friends. Do you know James and Al Potter?"

"Umm, no," Scorpius said quickly. "Anyways, I need to go." He dashed out of the compartment, squeezing past a boy with straight black hair and green eyes.

He opened the door to an apartment, gritted his teeth, and walked in. There was a girl with auburn hair clutching a small tote bag.

"I'm Scorpius." He breathed, not bothering to give a last name. "Can I hide out here for a little while?"

"You're the Malfoy, aren't you?" She asked appraisingly. "My dad told me your dad was a slimy git, and that I should outscore you on everything. And sure." She patted the seat next to her. He sat down, sighing in relief. He stared at her.

"And what's your name?" He asked.

"Rose Weasley. My dad is Ron and my mom is Hermione." He gaped at her.

"You're the kid of two war heroes?" He said with shock.

"Well, you're the kid of a war coward and an American…" She said with a smile.

"Thanks for not hating me. This kid named Seamus Thomas was like about to beat me up."

"I don't go for this whole 'rivalry' thing. If you don't act annoying to me, I won't to you. Sound like a plan?"

"Yeah. So do you like Quidditch?" He asked hesitantly, trying to further along the conversation.

"Well, Dad is obsessed with the Chudley Cannons, Mum could care less. I was taught how to fly real early on, though, so I'm good at flying. I'm not obsessed with it, though, I just like recreational flying. You?"

"My dad is obsessed with it in general; I have a Firebolt back home and he makes me practice constantly. I'm too small to be anything but a Seeker, though."

"Wasn't your dad one?"

"Yeah, so was Harry Potter," Scorpius said bitterly. He didn't like the man who had made his father a traitor, and himself an outcast.

A witch came through their compartment, pushing a cart covered with candy. Scorpius, feeling so excited at making his first real friend, ordered two Licorice Wands, handing one to Rose.

"Thanks." She said, staring at it, smiling. "I don't like licorice though," and she handed it back to him. Scorpius smiled at her hesitantly.

"Yeah. I'd advise you to stay away from James," Rose said, her face turning serious, deep in thought. "He is a bit of a prick, thinks he owns the school, and such, and he has no problem carrying on the rivalry."

"Yeah." Scorpius said, slightly gloomy. He perked up slightly. "Hey, have you met Lorcan and Lysander?" He realized he didn't even know their last name (it wasn't Lovegood, because that was their mother's name)

"Have I met them!" She laughed. "We're family friends. They're crazy about the animals."

"Definitely. Lysander had this Puffskein that was almost four feet tall!"

"Oh, Mungo? Not surprised." She said, coolly. "Be glad they left some of their other pets at home."

"Yeah," he said philosophically, "I guess I should be. So do you have any other friends here?" Scorpius asked, hopeful that he could make friends by association.

"Sorry, other than Al, Lysander, and Lorcan, no. And I wouldn't hang out with Al, either; I don't think James would take to kindly to you trying to befriend his brother."

Scorpius nodded. He didn't want to hang out with a Potter. On the other hand, a Weasley-Granger was not objectionable to him at all. Well, to _him _was the key word. His dad would freak, as the colloquialism went. His mother would not care, but then again, his mother was dead.

Scorpius sighed loudly, and put his head against the seat.

"How much longer do you think it will be?" He complained with an over exaggerated whine.

"God, I hope not much longer," Rose said with a grin. "Oh no! It's a Malfoy! It's gonna eat me!" She stuck out her tongue at him. He laughed, and asked her on the spur of the moment, "Did you learn any magic before you came here?"

"A bit. I learned the spell for lighting the wand, but that's about it. You?"

"I learned the spells to lock and unlock things, and how to Stun people."

"Isn't that a second-year spell?" Rose asked, impressed.

"My dad taught me for self-defense purposes." Scorpius said, paling slightly at the very thought of having to defend himself. He was a Malfoy, he thought to himself again, as he always had, you should be strong. If you're a Malfoy, he replied to himself, you're a pretty shoddy one. Making friends with the daughter of Ron! Was he deranged?

Nah, he comforted himself with a thought; at least I'm not a Muggle-born. I have wizard blood, centuries of it, running through me. I'm not stupid like them.

He said those words his father had often told them, and wondered to what extent he really believed them.

He laid back against the seat, pressing his head into the pillow, and fell asleep, feeling Rose's eyes press against the back of his neck.

So, R R! Dudes, really consider this. Umm, if Scorpius isn't exactly like Malfoy, if he has a conscious, doubts, and a lack of conceit, he's an INDIVIDUAL. He's not the second coming of Draco, he's his own person. Also, blame Maxima Goyle.


	2. HorrorDreamsCold'Accidents'

Son of a Dragon

Chapter 2: Horror Dreams and Cold 'Accidents'

Summary: Scorpius has to deal with, among other things, a portrait portfolio, a New Age ghost, the Malfoy Internal Spy System, cruel instigator/dumb blond stereotypes, crippling food allergies, and the Murderer's Map (not to be confused with the Marauder's Map.)

_Do you know what your father did to my Dad? A sneering voice asked. _

_No, sorry, Scorpius said, not understanding any difference. That was until he realized that whoever had asked him the question had not done it in tangible words. The voice he heard resounded through his skull, it echoed through the chamber of his ribcage, through the twisted ivory tunnels of his marrow. _

_No surprises there, Malfoy. Do you know what your father did to me? I guess you don't, you wimpy spider. Well, here's what he did; he body bound my father, threw and Invisibility Cloak over him, and beat him nearly to the point of death. What makes me think you'll be any different?_

_Why is everyone like this? I'm NOT my Dad! Scorpius thought with all the vehemence he could muster, finally able to voice his thoughts, or, well, to think his thoughts to another. _

_Well, Skorpy, the voice said, full of mock pity, you can't HELP it, can you, you widdle inbred person. Your Malfoy family has been inbred for several generations. Like look at your family tree. How many lines cross? Cousin to cousin, brother to sister, mother to son._

_Hey, that only happened once! Scorpius protested, knowing that, too, was a lie._

_You Malfoys have been conceited since the beginning. Rather have kids with your sister than another person, a non Malfoy. And now, you've trapped yourself in your conceit, you idiots. Do you have the brain cells to change your beliefs? I doubt it. What other defects do you have, besides sheer arrogance to the point of alarming stupidity?_

_Well, Scorpius said, my little sister Placida is blind. My grandmother was not born with two feet, although she hid it well. Even Dad has- Scorpius stopped._

_I'm in a dream, aren't I?_

_Yes, the voice said. How did you know?_

_Everything's shaky; my words seem to be tilted slightly, I don't know how to describe it._

_The voice, improbably, raised its nonexistent eyebrows; Scorpius could just tell these things. Well if it were up to me, the voice said viciously, you'd never wake up. However, I can only do this. Scorpius felt his own hand rise up (he had forgotten about any part of his body other than his mind until then) and punch him in the nose._

_Take that, scum. I only hope that you'll waste your life as soon as possible. I'll be waiting._

_Who are you?_

_I think you know who, Scorpius, the voice said, filling Scorpius with a fear that came from far away. Scorpius heard it from far away, felt it coming closer. He couldn't run though, but if it hit him, he'd be over._

_That's right. I've been waiting to catch up to you for a while now, the voice taunted, words tempered as sharp as steel, searing as liquid iron. _

_So have your precious stay at Hogwarts, it mocked, enjoy it while you can. A dark shadow shaped like a hand…_

"Wake up, you oaf!" Rose practically shrieked in his ear. "I've been trying to wake you for ten minutes! You really need to change right now! We're almost here! And what happened to your nose? When I came back, it was bleeding."

Scorpius looked at her, touching a hand to his nose. He pulled his hand up. Blood parted company with his afflicted body part, joining his hand. He frowned, almost crying for some inexplicable reason.

He went to the bathroom, and changed into his robes. He saw a familiar gray rat. He picked it up, careful to handle it around its middle rather than its tail.

"Prewitt? Oh great, I should return you to Lorcan."

He said a hurried goodbye to Rose and headed to Lorcan and Lysander's compartment.

Scorpius opened the door, and saw Mungo just barely scraping the ceiling, having grown over five feet since he saw it last.

"My god, Lysander, what is with that thing?" Scorpius asked, not so much frightened as worried for the sake of the Hogwarts castle. Would it be rolled over by a giant Puffskein comparable to King Kong in Tokyo?

Mungo grinned and winked, revealing sharp teeth.

"Are Puffskein even supposed to have-"

"Prewitt!" Lorcan cried gratefully, snatching the rat out of Scorpius's arms.

"Why do you keep on running away? I missed you!" He gave the rat a kiss on the nose. Scorpius snorted with a smile.

"I mean. Sarcasm! Misanthropy! Apathy! Wahoo wah! These are my favorite life values!" Lorcan said hurriedly.

"Hey, James, have you met Scorpius?"

Scorpius rushed out of the room, almost tripping over his robes. Where to go? Where to go?

He couldn't go with Rose; that would be the first place they'd look. He opened another random compartment, saw who was in it, and shut it, running away even faster. However, a hand grabbed him and pulled him back into the compartment, and more specifically, into her arms.

"Scorpius! Where were you?" She asked in characteristically hoarse voice.

"Oh, I've been around," Scorpius said, staring at the ground.

"Well, you should've told me!" She yelled, her bushy eyebrows contorting her face into a fearsome expression. She smacked him in the shoulder. "We have some catching up to do!"

"Yeah, we do," Scorpius hurriedly agreed, shrinking from her.

"Like for one thing, you asshole, why you pretended to be sick every time I came over! You're making me look so stupid! Well, that's gonna be different! Now on, we're gonna be best friends, right?" The last sentence she said softer than the others. However, Scorpius was just as intimidated. She was the one, he knew, to blame for him being timid as a rabbit; she bossed him around constantly, scared him from Day 1, but his dad didn't let him fight back, just because she was a girl. He didn't see anything soft or feminine about that fearsome face, plump body, and wiry-haired arms full of fat and muscle.

"Yeah, of course, Maxima." He tried to reason with himself. Even though she scared him, she really did like him, or liked ordering him around, at any rate.

He heard the steam whistle sound, loud as a gunshot, only more persistent and less shocking.

Time for the rest of his life to begin.

_What life?_

Scorpius shut out further horror dreams, and went outside, knowing he was near Hogwarts. He just had to ride a boat to get there, he'd heard about this. It was supposed to be very beautiful, seeing the home of his next seven years slowly come into glorious view. Maxima Goyle, with pincer-like arms that could probably put any lobster to shame, grabbed onto him.

"Let's go into the same boat!" She said, happily, her cute, child-like voice sharply contrasting her vise-like grip that threatened to splinter Scorpius's bones.

Lorcan and Lysander, laughing, took pity on them and joined them too, along with a slightly familiar-looking boy with green eyes and pin straight black hair.

"Hey, Scorpius, this here is Al. Al, this is Scorpius Malfoy."

Al ruffled his pin straight hair with his fingers; Scorpius had to restrain himself from pointing out that such straight hair would just fall exactly back into place. In two milliseconds, he was proven right in that hypothesis.

Al smiled at him, as though he didn't hate Scorpius. Scoprius frowned in return. He didn't want to be beaten up by James for being friends with him! He sighed.

"Where's Mungo?" He thought to ask.

"Mungo's in here," Lysander said, patting his pocket. He pulled out Mungo, who could fit in the palm of his hand.

"Wow." Scorpius said.

The boats started moving by an unknown force, skimming across the water. Scorpius, while he would never admit it, was beginning to feel sick and quaky already. However, as his dad always told him, "Show no weakness." He showed a lot more weakness than his dad, but he would not openly display his flaws to a group of his father's enemies' children.

The boats picked up speed, and the wind whipped at their ears. It howled like a mangled animal, and Scorpius's ears were turning red, clearly offset by his pale skin.

Meanwhile, Lysander was patting Mungo, the small kitten perched on his shoulder like another furry head somehow attached haphazardly to his shoulders. Lorcan, on the other hand, had Prewitt on his shoulder, and Günter was currently jumping up like an excited dog that looked like a disease-carrying rodent.

Al, on the other hand, was far more quiet, looking out in the distance, searching for a sight of Hogwarts. Scorpius, on the other hand, looked back for a second, watching everything else fade, becoming gray and insubstantial.

Maxima punched him in the shoulder, and he struggled to regain the balance before becoming closer to the choppy water in the boat's wake.

"Yeah, this is gonna be sweet, huh man?" She said in her throaty voice.

Scorpius wanted to whine 'You almost knocked me off,' but didn't want to look like a girl, especially in front of the manliest one he knew.

He turned around to the side, and heard the students in the boats next to him oohing and aahing at the sight of a distant castle manifesting itself from out of the gray twilight. He slowly turned around, wondering what he would see, and he felt someone push his side, and he toppled headfirst into the water.

The water was _cold. _It was paralyzingly cold. His body tingled enormously, than seemed to freeze. To move his arms even a little bit seemed a giant strain.

As though the world was ending around him, he saw slowly Lorcan and Lysander run to the side of the boat. He couldn't hear their murmurs clearly, but what he heard clearly was Maxima:

"Swim, you idiot!" He sighed. She was so annoying. Out of the corner of his eye, when the waves were at their trough, not their crest, he could see a castle approaching rapidly.

He looked at Al, who smiled at him in a way that seemed a trifle less sincere than it should be, given that he was drowning. Scorpius stuck his tongue out at him, and Al just grinned.

All of a sudden, Scorpius felt his feet against something. Scrabbling frantically on whatever surface had just appeared, his legs gave out, but somehow the surface rose up to meet him- and it didn't stop. The surface was soft, slippery, with an almost rubbery quality to it. He noticed all of a sudden that he was sitting in a sucker of some giant limb of a giant sea monster. When that became clear, he tried to jump off of it, but the suckers seemed to be holding him firmly in place. The limb rose out of the water, and when it was a foot above the boat, he was dropped unceremoniously back onto it. He stared, and saw the head of a giant squid rise out of the water. Lysander stared at it with a frenetic interest of a naturalist, but Lorcan stared at it with this crazy look that was akin to a form of love.

Maxima stared at Lorcan. After the squid left, Lorcan smiled to himself, and it never quite left his face.

"It's SO adorable!" He exclaimed to Lysander, Al, and Scorpius. "Did you see it's little beak?"

"Little?" Scorpius asked.

"And its arms! They were such a nice shade of peach!"

"Arms?" Al asked.

"Yeah, they're actually not called 'tentacles.' Well, two of them are, but the main eight are called arms."

"Well, learn something new every day, dontcha!" Maxima said, who actually sounded interested.

"Yeah, isn't it-" Lorcan continued.

"Lorcan! We're almost there! Stuff it! I don't want you to talk about squid anatomy when we first go to Hogwarts!" Lysander said, for once sounding slightly less gentle than a newborn kitten. "He's always loved squids, thought they were the coolest, along with rats and other weird things, so a REALLY BIG SQUID is like amazing for him. I, on the other hand, have _normal _pets, like Veil here!" He gestured to the kitten. Meanwhile, Mungo swelled to the size of a bowling ball.

Scorpius loved irony, and he burst into a swell of laughter that lasted until they reached the shore of Hogwarts.


	3. Allergies and Sorting Hats

Son of a Dragon

Son of a Dragon

Chapter 3: Allergies and Sorting Hats

The boats slowed their fast pace quickly as the shoreline approached rapidly. This sudden slowing caused the boat to rock a bit, and Scorpius held on for dear life.

Standing before Hogwarts, the students all looked around.

"Wasn't someone supposed to meet us?" Lysander finally asked. The other students fell silent.

"I thought so," Rose said.

The same Asian boy that Scorpius had met before in the train pushed to the front.

"I'm Head Boy, I can handle this. I came on the first-year boats in case this was to happen!" He swept to the front with an impeccable confidence and a regal bearing, the dying sun gleaming on his black hair.

He knocked twice, and a man with an honest, round face opened the door.

"Hello!" He said brightly, his arms open, as though to show that he was unthreatening. His smile mirrored his exaggerated peaceful gestures, showing a lot of white teeth.

"I'm Neville Longbottom, Herbology Professor, and Head of the Gryffindor House. I think we forgot to send someone to meet you all. Thank you for handling them, Cedric. Everyone, this is Cedric Chang. He was probably too modest to introduce himself." Cedric grinned and waved, looking completely at ease.

"So yes! Everyone come along! It's time for the feast! It'll be in the Great Hall!" The Muggleborns, who were quite easily distinguished from the Purebloods in Scorpius's opinion, gaped almost constantly: from when the saw the castle to when they entered the castle, to when they finally saw the ceiling and long tables of the Great Hall. The tables, however, were all empty. Scorpius wondered exactly why this was. He gulped audibly, feeling the eyes of the rest of the school on him and his other first years.

He lined up, as did the other first years, against a wall.

An elderly man approached a podium. He was completely bald, and his head shone in the light. He did, however, have a drooping salt-and-pepper mustache. He had purple eyes the color of eggplants, and he altogether looked very strange. He held up a large sheaf of notes, presumably a speech of sorts.

He cleared his throat. "It's a great day," in a high, reedy voice, "today, as a whole new generation of Hogwarts students enters the building. And now, we will continue with a glorious tradition: the Sorting Hat!"

The rest of the school erupted into cheers, and Professor Longbottom put a hat down on an old, lopsided, rickety stool that looked unbalanced just from the hat on it.

"Ajmani, Ilosia!" The elderly man called out, reading from a seemingly endless list, a piece of parchment that he held in his hands (so long it descended to the ground).

An Indian girl with an aquiline nose, a tall frame with bulky shoulders, and vibrant red lips walked up, and sat on the stool. She put on the hat, and the hat somehow opened its mouth and called out,

"Ravenclaw!" She smiled, her dark eyes brimming with satisfaction. She patted the hat affectionately after she pulled it off her head, as the Ravenclaw table roared in delight at getting the first new student.

Scorpius didn't really care, though, and tuned this all out. He was an M; he had a while to wait.

He only listened next when they announced Maxima.

Maxima, before she had even put on the hat, had the delight of hearing the hat yell "SLYTHERIN!"

He groaned though; this meant they'd be in the same house.

And so, while not attentively, Scorpius waited patiently for his turn.

And, finally, it came.

"Malfoy, Scorpius!" Scorpius walked up smugly, eager to be sorted; he was proud that Malfoy was his name.

He sat down and put the hat on his head.

_This will be difficult, _the hat said as a sort of greeting.

_I didn't know you talked_ Scorpius thought in return.

_Only when I need to, _the Hat said, sounding amused, as one might laugh at the antics of a little boy.

_Well, _he said. _You are not brave; you are no Gryffindor._

_Of course not! _Scorpius thought, highly affronted.

_You are not clever, either. A little slow on the uptake, it's true. Ravenclaw is out._

_Alright, _Scorpius said, hoping soon that the hat would label him a Slytherin.

_You want to be a Slytherin?! _The hat laughed, and Scorpius found it odd to feel its brim shaking up and down in mirth on his head.

_What is your biggest goal? _Presumably searching his mind, the hat fell silent.

_Your biggest goal is to be like your father. _The hat said.

_I want to make him proud, _Scorpius explained grudgingly.

_Well, why would you be in Slytherin, then? You have absolutely no ambition. You merely want to do what your father did, or be as good as him. You have neither drive nor original goals. Only one house remains._

_Hufflepuff?! _Scorpius cried within the domed chamber of his skull, _Hufflepuff? I can't be in Hufflepuff! My father…_

"HUFFLEPUFF!" He heard the hat yell to the whole room. Scorpius sunk in the stool, paler than new snow, and as he got off the stool, wobbly-legged in fear and anger, he slammed the hat down a trifle disrespectfully on the stool. He went over to the Hufflepuff table, where Lysander energetically waved him to a nearby spot.

"Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!"

"I'm not." Scorpius said bitterly. "My dad won't take this well. At all. Neither will I, now that I think about it. Can I petition or something? Is there anything I can do?"

Lysander laughed, and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry, it'll be fine. Hufflepuff is a great house."

Scorpius sneered. He hadn't heard _anything_ good about Hufflepuff. He sighed, and gritted his teeth.

His dad couldn't know. That much he knew.

He waited, not paying attention, thinking gloomy thoughts until he heard names he recognized.

"Potter, Albus!" took literally over fifteen minutes to get sorted, just sitting there with the hat on his head, looking pensive. Scorpius hoped he didn't look quite so stupid when he was doing that, although he knew that his conversation was over in a mere couple of minutes. Eventually, he was sorted into Slytherin, and Scorpius couldn't help but seethe with jealousy that a Potter was a Slytherin but he wasn't.

Seamus Thomas, still wearing his vibrant rainbow scarf, haughtily climbed onto the stool, putting the hat on. He, on the other hand, didn't seem to realize that he could simply talk to the hat with his thoughts.

"Slytherin? Are you out of your freakin' mind? Why would I want to be one of THEM?"

A pause, and Seamus listened attentively.

"I am NOT ambitious!"

Another pause.

"Is it such a crime that I want to make the world a better place? Huh? That's not AMBITION, that's DEVOTION!"

The hat shook, and Scorpius didn't know if it was in fear or laughter.

"GRYFFINDOR!" The hat yelled, sounding altogether rather sheepish.

Rose, the last one Scorpius knew, was sorted into Ravenclaw in five seconds.

The last entries to be sorted were presumably Blaise Zabini's twin children, Lacole and Xantara.

Lacole was sorted into Hufflepuff, and Xantara, who fiercely shoved the hat onto her head, was rewarded with a "GRYFFINDOR!" less than a moment afterwards. The Sorting was completed, the year had begun.

"Ahem!" The headmaster said. "For those who do not know me, I am your Headmaster, Professor Regulus Moonshine. I hope all of you have a wonderful stay here at Hogwarts." He smiled a trifle awkwardly.

"For those of you who don't know the heads of houses, the head of Gryffindor is Professor Neville Longbottom, the head of Ravenclaw is Professor Anthony Goldstein," he gestured to a handsome man with curly dark brown hair and gleaming chestnut eyes, "the head of Hufflepuff is Professor Susan Bones, and the head of Slytherin House is Blaise Zabini!" Here he gestured to Susan Bones, a woman with long auburn braids down her face, with a somewhat dreamy, unfocused, and slightly sad expression in her indigo eyes.

"That's the head of House?" Scorpius whispered, wrinkling his nose.

Blaise Zabini, on the other hand, had extremely dark hair, and skin the color of coffee. He stared at the world with a hawklike gaze. Lysander frowned at him, showing negative emotion that Scorpius thought he was practically incapable of.

"I will go into particulars after the Feast, so enjoy eating!" The food materialized in front of them.

Scorpius, his stomach seeming to also protest his new House, was queasy and shaky; his appetite gone, he just buttered a slice of bread and gingerly put it to his mouth. He ate it, and as soon as he did, he could tell that something was wrong.

His eyes darted around the room, as he felt his throat began to constrict. He panted heavily, until he could pant no more. He put his hands to his neck, and wheezed, his brain crying out for oxygen.

The ancient nurse, Madam Pomfrey, instantly shouted "Episkey!" And the wad of digested food flew out of his mouth. She ran over to him, and opened his mouth, looking in like she was inspecting a cow for purchase.

"Regulus! We need to bring him to the infirmary!" She instantly cast a spell: "Levicorpus!" She said, and Scorpius found himself levitated on a stretcher of air.

They rushed him to the hospital, and as his mind floated in and out of consciousness, all he could think of was how dorky he probably looked.


	4. Hospital Wings and Tickled Pears

Chapter 4: Hospital Wings and Flower Child Ghost

Chapter 4: Hospital Wings and Flower Child Ghost

Summary: Scorpius has to deal with, among other things, a portrait portfolio, a New Age ghost, the Malfoy Internal Spy System, cruel instigator/dumb blond stereotypes, crippling food allergies, and the Murderer's Map (not to be confused with the Marauder's Map.)

He woke up with Professor Moonshine and Madam Pomfrey staring over him. He blinked his eyes, and then sat up. He felt exceptionally sore, but other than that, he _did_ feel basically fine.

"What happened?" He asked, his voice rough.

"Your body has just fought off a lot. You are allergic to all foods prepared by magic, apparently." Professor Moonshine said softly.

"I am? But…" Scorpius then remembered that after some house elf his dad had had growing up as a little child had been set free and caused problems later on for the Malfoy family, his father had forced all other house elves in their house to not use magic for anything, even for cooking.

"Why? How?" Scorpius's heart fell, remembering the taunting of the voice in the horror dream. He was inbred. Was that why?

"Someone most likely put a curse on your family, which is entirely likely, and it passed on to you, the single male heir, or it's a strange genetic offshoot. This hasn't ever happened before to any Malfoy in our records, however, so this curse must have been rather recent." He cleared his throat, and then stared at Madam Pomfrey.

"You can't eat your meals in the Great Hall, boy. The food is teleported there by magic. You'll have to eat specially prepared meals in the Kitchens." She croaked, staring at him with a hard, sagging face.

"But… Couldn't I take my meals in the Great Hall, but the house elves could bring the food to me?"

"Well, my boy, I advise you to think about it. You're brought special hand-delivered food. What will your peers think?"

Scorpius thought of Seamus Thomas, and frowned. That Malfoy, he's so conceited he needs an elf to _deliver _his meals to him. Who does _he _think he is? Scorpius shook his head; he could picture it already.

"I see we're of similar minds," Professor Moonshine said with a tentative smile. "So I'm sorry, there's nothing to be done about it, but you'll eat your meals in the Kitchen. The Kitchens are located right under the Great Hall. To get there, go down the main staircase in the Great Hall, turn right, and you'll see an enormous painting of a bowl of fruit. Then, you must tickle the pear."

"What?" Scorpius asked, figuring that the allergy curse or whatever it was must have left his ears damaged or his mind too addled to understand.

"Tickle the pear, my boy."

"Come again?"

"TICKLE THE PEAR!" Pomfrey finally screamed shrilly. Scorpius smirked.

"Don't give this information out to everyone. The House Elves cannot be bothered by greedy students. Is that clear?" Professor Moonshine glared at Scorpius. Scorpius thought of Maxima beating a small, whimpering house elf with a strainer, demanding more food.

"Yes," Scorpius responded quietly.

"Good. Now, you can head up to your dorm. What house are you again, my boy?"

"Hufflepuff."

Pomfrey snorted rather loudly, and tried to cover that up with a strange-sounding giggle.

Scorpius left dejected that even members of the faculty were laughing at him.

He knew that somehow the Hufflepuff common rooms were associated with the Entrance Hall. He figured that they were somehow above it. However, he got quite confused soon. Malfoys didn't get lost. Confused. That was it.

However, Scorpius realized later, he should have known better when he heard a voice beckoning him.


End file.
